Kristen Blog

 Summer seems to be slipping through my hands like sands through the hourglass (so are the days of our lives...). Lovely wildflowers at one of our all time favorite parks in Liberty, Stocksdale.  It has changed A LOT over the years, but it continues to be a place of joy for the O'Haras.  I feel like we have less opportunity to appreciate time outside together.  I guess that just makes the time we get even more valuable...right? Baseball is taking up a lot of it.  The kid plays twice a week and nearly every weekend.  You would think that might lead to burn out, but...this is MY son we are talking about.  Evan has had a very iPad summer.  He doesn't always want to go to the games, and I am often appreciative when he chooses to stay with his sisters or Grandma or his friend, Daniel.  It is more fun for him and less complaining I have to endure. He hung in like a champ last weekend.  It was hot, and we had a long day.  (Sundays are play...

I never realized how much I identified with Bono.     I, too, have been searching all over - the highest heights and the deepest depths - for so long...but I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.     Even more, I seem to have managed to find it and lose it all over again, many times over.     Going, happily, round and round my mulberry "bush." I would look to the past...d on't we all, at times, ache for the past?... if it hadn’t been even more lonely, isolating and depressing.  (But what am I saying?  I prefer to  be alone.    I just guess I didn’t like myself enough to know it back then.)  Sometimes I wish I could blindly believe “back in the day” is what I am longing for.    What can I say?    I am too honest, too literal…to practical???    Sometimes I actually wish I could just fall for the fascade for a bit.    Just a moment…happily, innocently, blindly, naively believe ...

Well, listen...if I'm honest, things have been a bit rough around here.  Sometimes, whether by my own hand, by circumstance, by others, or by the hand of God...one too many cards get placed on the stack, and the whole structure comes tumbling down. We do what we know to do...we recover and we rebuild. If I'm totally honest, that is where I stand tonight.  There are too many things on my heart, and there are too many unresolved aches to say I am free and clear.  However, it NEVER hurts to focus on the happy things.  So...here is the recap of our latest happy things: I am in a new stage of finishing projects and using up excess materials.  (I have even been seen throwing things away...so unlike me, I know!)  I have an untold stash of yarns...an estate sale here (makes up the meat of it), a need there, and a birthday gift both here AND there...it has added up over time.  And I have decided I am ready to minimize and simplify when it comes to my crafting w...

The boys are officially done with school!!!  Do you know what this means? 3 months free of mornings for me.  Thank You, God!! Sliding into summer like... You guys...I promise I do not exaggerate when I say I am soooooo bad at mornings.  And I promise I'm not just being lazy...or a big baby.  In fact, there are mornings when I can get up early just fine.  But not consistently.  And when I can't.  I CAN NOT.  There was one day last week (the final week, which should have been motivating) I dragged myself - and them - out of bed at 7:10.  It's a 15 minute drive, and we have to be there by 7:45!!  That same morning, I seriously considered keeping them home, so I could get sleep.  I am completely irrational when I am tired. I have inherited a sleep disorder and very likely some other missed diagnoses (being a counselor is teaching me so much about myself!), suffice to say this is why Matt guards the door when I am taking a nap.  He ...

 Yep...you read that right! Unfortunately, it is Manhattan, KS, and I am spending the entire Mother's Day weekend alone with my 12yo (sarcastic and often belittling) son.  We'll see how I manage to keep my cool. The male version mini-me.  It has been a special time, so far...one more day of gaming to go.  💕⚾ I had thought my solo travels a thing of the past, but…once again God and destiny laughed in my face. Alright then, I have experience with this sort of thing (and losing sleep over missed holidays is so 1999!).  #healthcarewife.  I had my mind set to make it simple and pack light.  Matt thought otherwise. I came into the kitchen to find he had already started gathering items and making a list of essentials, which included: a loaf of bread, a large tub of peanut butter, several cups, a gallon of milk, and an almost full VERY large box of wine.  And that was just the start of his packings for me.  Apparently, he would not be sending THIS w...

I hope he gets his Dad's composure. Oh, dear Heavenly Father, help me. There is no emotion greater than the one I experience as I watch my son and my “adopted” sons play baseball. When they are down in the count, and I am SCREAMING all the encouragement and confidence I can muster into their precious little brains. And I think, if I holler loudly enough the right combination of words, maybe I can break the back of self defeat before it slithers down from their heads to their hearts. Oh how my mama heart aches. Because I want better for them. I want easier. I don’t want them to suffer the things I suffer in this overly active and self critical brain. I don’t want them to internalize the voice of self abasement I hear constantly ridiculing me…at this particular moment, for not being able to control my tongue, let alone my emotions. (You guys…I am supposed to be a counselor. I hope to GOD I never see a client on the ball fields. 🤞🏻😭). And God help the person who tips this al...